Cindyisms

Look People I think this is either week two or three and I’m posting again! Maybe the dry spell has ended. Maybe just maybe I can keep this vow! Oh wouldn’t it be nice.

It takes about three weeks…I have been hearing that a lot lately. The doctor said that about the caffeine. He said if you can stay caffeine free for three weeks your in the clear. Three fucking weeks? I’m going to try again and keep on trying. But you know what is difficult about it? I run on caffeine. So I have to learn to sleep if I get tired instead of drinking a pop. Well if there is such thing as beauty sleep I should be pretty damn hot in a month. I’ve only been up since 11:00AM and I could use a nap. Please and thank you.

Three weeks is how long before the anti-depressants are supposed to work right to. I dunno I’ve been taking them for three days and I really don’t give a shit about to much of anything right now! But I know what he meant. He meant before I feel closer to normal. Of course I’m not sure what normal is for me anymore.

Three weeks is how long it’s going to get the water weight gone on the diet that I’m doing. For the next three weeks, every time I turn around I’m gonna have to pee! Like I didn’t pee enough before. My hands and feet are puffy and believe me the last thing I need it to look more puffy.

Three weeks is how long it will take to adjust to a daily exercise plan says the doctor. GRRREAT! He says once I get in the habit I’ll start enjoying it and not want to miss a day. I think he is mixing up exercise with sex. If excersing lead to orgasm I would believe him.

So in three weeks I should be off the caffeine, out of water weight, like to exercise and be in a better state of mind. I guess we’ll see!

At my local library there is a quilter’s club and they have made the most beautiful quilt I have ever seen.  It is being raffled off on November !5th. and I WANT IT BAAAD!  So each time I come to the library I buy a ticket.  I have bought four so far.  I wish I had about twenty bucks to piss away because I would buy twenty more tickets.  It’s black and green and beautiful.  Reminds me of the stuff my Great Grandma and Great Aunt used to do.  So keep your fingers crossed.  Maybe I’ll get lucky and win it!!

That is married to a man that thinks he has the right to go through her stuff.  Look at her personal thoughts in her journal, make assumptions about what he reads and then reacts to those assumptions.  I have a friend that used to write all the time but doesn’t anymore because it makes for to many fights when she writes things that her husband doesn’t like.  I have a friend that knows that her husband is being nosey and isn’t about to start another pissing contest over it.  I have a friend that isn’t happy and isn’t going to sitting around acting like she is.  Husbands my advice: IF YOU ARE THE NOSEY TYPE, KEEP YOUR NOSE OUT OF YOUR OLD LADIES BUSINESS.  IF SHE WANTS YOU TO KNOW SOMETHING SHE WILL TELL YOU.  YOU GOING THROUGH HER STUFF JUST PISSES HER OFF. 

Ladies: If you live with someone that is nosey don’t tolerate it.  Tell him to keep out of your shit or get the fuck out.

The weather can’t make up it’s mind what it is going to do and that makes my mood jumbled too.  That and I’m sitting by some dude in the library that breathes really loud and when he gets pissed sounds like he is growling like my dog!  I can’t help but laugh!

So this weekend one co-worker calls out so I end up pulling a couple of doubles.  Which is usually cool except I drop a big ass pan on my foot and brusied it all up.  Then I stepped off the last step of the stairs in that basement and twisted my other ankle.  GRRR!  What a dip shit!  Don’t I know I need those to walk?

Today is an off day.  So David and I went to pay bills and are going to hobble around the grocery store (I’m gonna hobble, he’s just gonna walk).  Then it is back home to tackle the mess stacking up in the livingroom.  Once that is cleared and I hopefully get done with that today it’s time to get the Halloween decorations out!  I’ll start that little project on Wednesday! 

Other then that things are good.  Some overtime this week (thank God) and I think I have a training course too.  Take care all! 

I’m making a vow! I’m making a vow to write one day a week because I miss you guys! So this is for this week. Now what the hell to write about?

Oh! Got it!  I got a new bed. Doctor said the terrible back pain is a combination of being fat and sleeping on a broken down mattress! So we tossed out the ten year old mattress and bought a new one. I LOVE IT! The only problem is the we didn’t have a frame with the old one so I pretty much rolled off unto the floor. Now I can basically stand up. So when I get up I fall on my butt, I’ll get the hang of it eventually. My back feels much better. I’m only really stiff for about a half hour now.

The only other concern is for the dog. We thought he would have trouble getting up and down, but he hasn’t. Which really isn’t a good thing. At his age he could jump down and hurt himself easily. So my husband is making him a step. Until then we put the ottoman at the end of the bed to jump off of.

So the next step is heading back out to the resale shop for some more sheets. I don’t know about you, but I can’t afford $50 for a sheet at the regular store.

Hi there.  Some time ago I used to blog here often.  Then life got in the way and now I pretty much stop by once in a while which sucks, but that’s life.

Wish I had something interesting to talk about during this little conversation.  But I work, I sleep and that’s about it.  I haven’t yelled at anyone, embarassed anyone in public or had a clothing malfunction in months.  The best I can give you was a loud burp at the store.  So I thought I would tell you I’m alive and I think about you often!

For me, but I’m not crying in my milk. I totally believe every new thing brings me more strength. I have so much to say and such little time to say it in that I’m going to just spit it out.

Thank you for all your anniversary wishes. We spent it working. I pulled a double that day and Dave worked the morning shift. So it was like good-morning happy anniversary, see ya.

A Late but still heart felt happy birthday to my niece Courtney and my brother Les. I swear the cards are in the mail.

Work is going really good. My boss has come back and has been wonderful. Calm and easy to talk to again. I’m trying to be the same way back. Makes work better for us both. And looks like we will have a new resident soon. That means overtime baby!! Okay more overtime then usual which is cool because I want to sign up for this class and it costs like $300. So I’ll take all the hours I can get.

Dave started a new job and he seems to like it a lot. It’s right around the corner from the house. He started as a temp, but they hired him in before his first week was finished. Usually the temps work for at least three months before being hired in.

Today is an off day so it’s getting a little bit of groceries, completing a little house work and sleeping a lot.

Other then that it’s work, work and more work. I think I need a life!

Yes it is a strange entry title for a woman to have unless I’m either looking for a new man or any one of the assorted sports balls out there. But it is neither.

Finding my balls is about taking some time to see what areas of my life I need to improve on and what areas I’m happy with. Then putting forth the effort to change things. Not just sitting back and hoping that things will work out. That the messy stuff will either go away on its own or be solved.

The hard part for me is that with all that has happened I’m not really sure where I stand on some things. And then at other times things seems clear. Like my job. I still love my residents and my co-workers, but I know I had to make some changes too. When my boss came back I decided to treat it as a clean slate. Like when you first start at a new company. She is my boss she deserves respect and she does her job well. She is a good person, we just tangle personality wise sometimes. Also when a new resident comes so will new staff. I have to remember to take a step back and listen more. Try to be less intimidating. All changes I’m sure of. So I can mark those off my list.

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When I was teaching school I had worked at a clothing store where I gathered a nice selection of clothes. Since I quit teaching the clothes have been in the closet waiting for special occasions to be worn. Those occasions don’t come everyday. But in less then a month I have had to wear four of the for funeral and family visitations. My teaching clothes have become my funeral attire. No real purpose to mentioning it other then it sucks.

Sorry I have not been around lately but since many of you read my mom’s blog know I lost my other mother a little over a week ago and things have been kind of up in the air. You know not knowing which end is up or one of my Momma’s favorite saying, “Not knowing my ass from a hole in the ground.” Is that right ma?Sounds right, but I could be wrong.

I want to write all about her. I want to tell you all a million different reason why this woman was so remarkable, but I just haven’t been able to put it into words yet. I still cry too much and too often. I can tell you this and it’s kind of strange but funny at the same time. I found out that she passed away on a Friday evening while I was at work. I still had a job to do so I did it the best that I could. That day and many days after that every time I would say the f-word I would look up to heaven and tell her I was sorry. Before she passed away and I would get upset and that word would come out of my mouth she would give that stern mother look and say,“Cindy Catherine!” and I’d stop and take a breath and calm down a bit. So I could picture her up there just giving me that look every time I said that word. Which pretty much everyone knows is often.

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